What are Bendtner’s 3 demands?

“I have three demands and I won’t sign a deal with a club who aren’t prepared to fill those demands.”

What, I wonder, are these three conditions that Barcelona, Real Madrid, Juventus, United and every top club around the world will be desperately trying to achieve? No games on a Sunday because of hangovers perhaps? A separate, gold plated changing room just for Nick maybe? Does anybody know?

One of the demands must surely be a new insurance broker, after the Danish Talent of the Year 2007 was recently in trouble for driving with no cover. Bendtner apparently told Police that he had someone who sorts that out for him. Maybe he wants a clause in his contract that ensures that all fines will be taken care of, whether for criminal damage or publicity seeking buffoonery.

It could be something as simple as insisting on the squad number 52, which he demanded at Arsenal in 2009. It is a very special number to him, coincidentally being the amount, in percent, of effort that he puts in when playing. Unfortunately for Arsenal fans, Wenger has failed to persuade the Dane that he should stay, so we will have to see who can lure him away.

I am surprised that he only has three demands. For a man who once got a mark of ten in a confidence rating that only went up to nine, there must be more that he needs. Membership to all the local clubs, Champion’s league football and a lovely throne to sit on do not even begin to do him justice.

Help me out here Gooners, what does Saint Nicklas need?

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51 thoughts on “What are Bendtner’s 3 demands?

  1. Bode

    1. best paid player
    2. Never seat on the bench
    3. prolific midfielder who can feed him with opportunity for him to score goals.
    LOL.

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 29 Thumb down 6

  2. Leoj the GH GUNNER

    he needs nothing. just sell that over rated dane who just makes me sick. nickolas overated 52% effort in games annoying lazy better than ibrahimovic bentner. thats his full name. just sell that DEADWOOD CRAP

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 4

  3. crusher

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Out of tune?. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 22 Thumb down 61

  4. jk

    New maserati for the one he crashed
    Boxers with advertising logos
    Every new squad member to tell him how great he is

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 25 Thumb down 5

  5. SeansterB

    Money Money Money

    It is looking worryingly like we are going to keep him

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 14 Thumb down 2

  6. SeansterB

    I will just add quickly…in football terms only i would prefer him to Chamakh if one was to leave. Shame he is not a nice human

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 23 Thumb down 3

  7. AdamJM

    Maybe his title “the greatest striker in the world” on his shirt,the number 52 and the 300k wages a week a player of his calibre deserves!!!!!

    Top Gooner!. Agree or not?: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 1

  8. mallam Prof

    @crusher LOL!!!
    Well he shld be gone already, he ain’t even worth the bench anymore.
    Goooooood Bye Nick, see u in d cypriot league in a few years

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1

  9. bsquared kuhepson

    Funny enough this guy has been able to find his way to my heart. I’m a big fan of he’s. I just pray that Wenger gets to keep him, and that he gets to prove people wrong about the so called 52percent perfomance that is falsely labelled agaist him.

    Opinions divided. What do you think? Thumb up 5 Thumb down 11

  10. Phil

    1. High pay
    2. A lot of playing time
    3. Playing in his position (upfront, not the wing)

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 3

  11. Seraphim

    I cant believe my eyes…people that thinks bendtner is a good player… thats like thinking Tottenham can win the league!!
    Please, get rid of the useless piece of rubbish…

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 4

  12. Gunners4life

    1. Thecaptaincy
    2. New pink boots
    3. A carer (top priority)

    Opinions divided. What do you think? Thumb up 9 Thumb down 4

  13. The Arsenal

    Bye Bendtner, take your ego and your pink shoes with you. Leave the jersey number, though. Gooners’ copy-right…as in “Arsenal 52 Spuds”. lol.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

  14. maddy

    These saga are disturbing arsenal progress for this season wenger better slove them quick.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  15. Ben

    Who cares? It’s probably the three reasons why he won’t be staying at Arsenal.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  16. kimon

    ∂øn’t sell him, we need guys like him to warm our bench. Benchner! Lol.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  17. GOONERGETYA

    HAS AN ARSENAL FAN I ONLY HAVE ONE DEMAND & THAT IS E HURRY UP AND SELL THIS JOKE

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  18. globalsafe

    Great article, good sense of humor also lots of funny responses.

    Well done all. Let’s hope now will have to say a very sorry good buy to his pinkxcellency

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  19. kim

    i gonna be honest.The brick head dane wasnt given enough chances at arsenal i must say.
    However you earn ya chance like the OX,Cesc,Vermalen and Koscielny.
    No body give chances. So all the best NB52 and drive safe to the where you belong.
    Looser!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 2

  20. toppy wilshere

    please, put chamakh transfer a priority over nick. the two of them out is the awaited biggest transfer ever for arsenal. i tell you.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  21. DCC

    He wants the following…

    (1) his mummy because the big boys keep picking on him…
    (2) his dummy – which he spat out and lost a few seasons ago
    (3) a smaller head ….. Coz he’s out grown the bugger he had

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  22. tommyt

    @crusher, I think its more that they don’t understand it rather than don’t appreciate it! So many African people on these blogs who don’t even try to speak good english yet they ‘claim’ to support an English team! lol

    COYG!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 7

  23. Tbanj

    @tommyt don’t insult africans okay.cos some of ‘us’ don’t speak gud english doesn’t mean nafin.stop being a rascist.try write in any african language and u’ll write gibo gaba.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 2

  24. D star

    @tommyt U r d most stupid person on earth to think we Africans dont speak or understand good english…idiot!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 2

  25. TruAfriGunner

    @D star

    And it makes us Africans look bad for you to unsult the real uk london fans! He has point anyway, most of us only use silly words for comment. @tommyt, Im african but I still appreciate you london fan who go to all games. you not stupid mate.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 2

  26. king j

    Bendtner is simply a bundle of shit…….plz wenga sell off d crap or kick his ass out of d emirate even if its free of charge(FOC)

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  27. Chris

    All ‘Deadwood’ Players, who are NOT productive for the Club, and cannot be ‘Sold On’, should be made to take a 30%-40% pay CUT. There’s a recession on after all, and ‘they’d survive’

    Any who refuse should have their contracts cancelled by the Club, on the CLUBS financial Compensation terms.

    I know people may say ‘ a contract is a contract’ or ‘it doesn’t work like that’ but look at it the other way.

    What gives Bendtner the arrogant conceited big-headed good for nothing Git that he is the right to say:

    “I have three demands and I won’t sign a deal with a club who aren’t prepared to fill those demands.”

    and THEN continue to sit back on his fat Backside, bad mouthing the Club, publicly saying ‘I’ll never play for Arsenal Again’ and ‘Anywhere but Arsenal’ and still SUCK £52,000 Per Week out of the Arsenal Football Club.

    Or maybe I’m being a bit harsh on the ‘Poor Boy’!!!!!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  28. Gooner Cape Town

    That Arsenal don’t want him to F*ck Off!
    That Arsenal don’t ask him to F*ck Off!
    That Arsenal don’t get him to F*ck Off!

    Just F*CK OFF Nik Bendtner, you are an egotistical wanker!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  29. Gooner Cape Town

    @tommyt: you are way out of line mate!~ You betta retract that comment about Africans, china!!
    I’m a white African and no one, no one insults us brothers like that. We are ALL Gooners, mate and because you are British doesn’t make your shit not stink!
    Think about it….

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  30. gery

    We surely don’t like his character, his ego. But is he really that bad? He does well with Sunderland. He played not really bad in Euro 12, he scored some important goals for Arsenal, if you remember.
    Actually that lame Chamakh deserves to be transferred sooner.

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  31. Jo cool

    @tommyt..wat can i say man! U try to convince us africans aint smart enough only to end up exposing urself,tell me sumthin c*ntface all those asians dat came out to cheer us at our pre-season tour, can they all speak or understand english? Do u say we dnt have arsenal fans in spain,france,germany nd all other non-english speakin countries? Does dat make em any less a gunner? Come to think of it arry cnt read,write or spell nd yet he’s english does that make him any less a human? See? ur the dumb one here mate!..nd unless u want me 2 ask my fellow african 2 get u ‘frimponged’ betta keep ur wide mouth shut!

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  32. Jerry

    1. A Tottenham hotsperms dildo built into his seat on the bench. 2. A copy of Fergies “how to chew gum correctly and look dumb on the pitch at the same time,” DVD. Actually scratch that last part, I forgot he only watches bluray in 3D. How dare I forget a detail for King Bendtner. I hope all my fellow Arsenal fans can forgive me for that, have mercy oh great Bendtner!! And finally # 3. A giant mirror behind the goal so if he scores his new celebration can allow him to make sure his make up hasn’t smeared. I’m pretty sure I’m right on this one. Wish there was a prize

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  33. scott

    This guy ia an 8-goal a season striker once a club can accept that about him, their romance will be endless

    Rate this comment: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

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